Ten
Ways to Request—and Receive—Constructive Criticism
by Beth Mende Conny
Copyright 1999-2008 Beth Mende Conny, WriteDirections.com.
All rights reserved in all media.
The content of this article may be forwarded in full without special permission provided it is used for not-for-profit purposes and full attribution and copyright notice are given. For all other purposes, contact Beth Mende Conny Beth@WriteDirections.com.
1. Understand and recognize the difference between constructive
and destructive criticism.
The former may not make you comfortable, but it does make you
think and ultimately act to improve your writing. The latter
saps you of energy and confidence, setting up hurdles and blocks
that slow or halt your personal or professional growth. Constructive
criticism is to be embraced, destructive criticism is to be ignored.
2. Don't ask if you're not willing to accept.
Criticism, however constructive, can be hard to take. Nonetheless,
it's imperative that you take it well, and even with grace and
style. Remember always, it ain't personal. It's about how you
can improve on something, make some thing better. You
must understand and accept this if you are listen to what others
have to say with an open mind and heart.
3. Choose your audiences carefully.
Don't request feedback from negative or small thinkers, e.g.,
individuals who have hidden agendas, difficulty accepting the
success of others, or a limited vision of what's possible. By
the same token, don't choose folks who love or respect you so
much that they would rather placate or protect you than offer
feedback that is honest and thereby helpful.
4. Choose an audience of 3-plus.
One person's opinion is, well, just one person's opinion; it
may or may not have validity. Two or more people saying the same
thing, even if in different ways, is harder to dismiss. The key
then is to have three of more "critics" to discern
if there are any "recurring themes." If so, you will
know that you have an issue that must be addressed if your writing
is to move onto a higher level.
5. Choose your audience the way you would a team.
Pick individuals with distinct experiences, areas of expertise,
and tastes. Each will come at his/her task from a unique perspective,
adding invaluable dimension to your project. Too, these varying
perspectives can pinpoint holes in logic, substance, and facts
that you might not have identified otherwise.
6. Provide instructions.
Let your "critics" know if there's anything in particular
you want them to read or look for. This enables them to focus
their sights on what's most important to you and to report back
accordingly, be it on your delivery, organization, choice of
topic, appearance, conclusions, etc.
7. Make your expectations clear.
State up front the kind of criticism you expect to receive. Let
your "critics" know it must be constructive, not destructive,
and that it must be specific. Comments like "I liked it,"
"You did a good job," "Looks good," are practically
meaningless. Too, they're as unsatisfying as a limp handshake;
one gets the sense that the other person isn't (wasn't) fully
engaged. Worst of all, such comments don't help you improve,
because they give you no solid information to work with.
8. Take two steps back.
All criticism (especially that coming from several "critics")
takes a while to sort through—and that's just fine. In fact,
it's preferable. Let the comments of others filter through your
system; let them co-mingle, evolve, take new shape, and open
new doors. Only when you've fully absorbed what's been said can
you decide how (or even if) you'll act on it.
9. Consult your most important critic.
Who is that all-important creature? You—first, last, and
always. Remember—your opinion matters. After all, you know
your work better than anyone else. You know what it was meant
to be. And you are the one, the only one, who can deliver on
its promise. Sure, the comments of others count; sure they can
be wonderfully helpful. Ultimately, however, you're the one in
charge. You have the final word. You are the one who must step
up to the plate and swing.
10. Become a constructive critic yourself.
When others ask for your feedback, model the best qualities of
a constructive critic. Be honest, specific, relevant, caring.
Most importantly, be present. Commit to really absorbing and
thinking about another person's work. It has taken a lot for
them to put themselves in your hands; be worthy of that trust.
Beth Mende Conny is the founder and president of WriteDirections.com. She has published more than four dozen books and collections, and helps
individuals and businesses bring their projects to publication. She can
be contacted at Beth@WriteDirections.com.
Copyright 1999-2008 Beth Mende Conny, WriteDirections.com.
All rights reserved in all media.
The content of this article may be forwarded in full without special permission provided it is used for not-for-profit purposes and full attribution and copyright notice are given. For all other purposes, contact Beth Mende Conny Beth@WriteDirections.com.
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